Sunday

Well, here I am, sitting in my living room quite alone on a Sunday afternoon. I slept til well past noon today because I was so exhausted, and I'm still not 100%. Apparently 10 hours isn't enough. Oh well.

My dreams are getting stranger and stranger by the day. I'm not even going to write the one I had last night out because it was just...well...*laughs* I have no idea what it was, really. It involved a lot of people very close to me, and everything was really messed up. I woke up feeling so confused because, once again, it felt so real, and when I opened my eyes, I was alone. I mean, nothing even really happened in the dream, at least not anything that should have been significant (to anyone else, I suppose...to me, it held a lot of meaning, and that scares me), but it left me feeling really empty when I realized it was just a dream. *sigh*

I just sat here and ate half a tub of chocolate frosting on graham crackers. Yum. This diet thing just really isn't working out for me, now when I'm trying to quit smoking too. Blah. Oh well, one thing at a time. Cigarettes will kill me faster than food, I suppose, so I guess I made the right choice there, huh? Ugh. That's probably why I've been so tired lately. Hahaha...

Waiting for my laundry to be done, then I might pop over to my brother's house to play some video games for a few hours. He came over this morning to see my dad because it's Father's Day today, and he said if I wanted to come over for awhile this afternoon I was more than welcome, so I think I'll take him up on it. We had so much fun at work yesterday because it was soooo slow, I kinda wanna go spend some time with him. I'm sure Leslie will drive me insane (if she's even awake yet), but oh well. Rick makes me laugh.

There's something wrong with my car, too. It keeps making this like...weird clunking noise, and that's pissing me off. I really don't have the money to fix it, but I have to take it in because I can't risk killing it and not having a car at all. I'm sure my grandmother will let me borrow the money, but I hate having to ask. It makes me feel so completely useless and worthless. I suppose it's better than not having anyone who can help me out, though. And it's not like she doesn't have the money, plus she keeps offering to help out if she can. I know she'll want me to take good care of the car, since it was hers to begin with. Just add this to my long list of crap that has happened to me...God knows it doesn't really make a difference anymore. *sighs again*

I'm really upset that Mel and I can't go to Finland in September, especially because it's all my fault. I just can't afford it, and that really sucks. I wanted to go so badly, and I know she's disappointed too. But we're going to try and go next summer, and even though we won't get to see Nightwish, we'll have plenty of time for sightseeing and maybe be able to go to a metal festival too. That should be fun. And this way I can go down and visit her for a weekend in a few weeks, which will be fun too. We'll figure out a way to make up for the fact that we won't be at the Hartwall show.

Which brings me to another point that I'm absolutely appalled with myself for not having mentioned earlier...WE'RE GOING TO SEE SONATA ARCTICA IN OCTOBER! They're playing with Dragonforce in Poughkeepsie on October 10th, and then doing a headlining show in Hartford on October 12th, so we're going to go to both. Mom's coming along too, so we'll probably head into NYC on the 11th and so some sightseeing, which should be fun. I can't wait to get back down there AND see Tony and the boys again ^_^ Stalking Sonata is so much fun xP

Anyway, I think I've written quite enough in here for the moment. I didn't mean to blather on like this for so long, but I suppose I felt the need. Blargh. Time to go do something productive.