I'm tired.

Not just physically tired, either. Of course I'm exhausted, I always am. That's probably never going to change. My body just can't seem to get enough sleep before my eyes pop open and I'm wide awake, and I don't seem to possess the ability to go to sleep early. I'm used to that. It doesn't help that I'm sick right now and feel like complete shit, but I suppose that's something I'm used to as well. I can't seem to go more than a day feeling decent before I get slapped with something else.

Mentally I'm at the end of my rope. I don't know what to do anymore. All I ever want to do is cry, and yet when I'm finally alone, I can't cry. I just can't. And that's so frustrating. I don't know how to pull myself out of this rut, because nothing seems to work. I try and do things with my friends and family, try to get out of the house, try writing, try listening to music, try talking to people...and it just doesn't work. I mean, it does for awhile, but then...*sighs* I'm hopeless...

I should go to bed. I have to be up early for a doctor's appointment. Oh joy, oh bliss.